Comments on Musings ... (J'y pense): Women’s Liberty: Is it how we think about it? - I

hi shudh,good post. In your efforts to delve deep ...

2007-10-30T12:55:00.000+05:30

hi shudh,

good post. In your efforts to delve deep into women's liberation and related issues, I would suggest you should talk to Dr. Suchitra Mathur.

She'll give you a different perspective, and her following of this subject is quite deep.

Hey, You might wanna read this poem written by one...

2007-10-04T04:55:00.000+05:30

Hey, You might wanna read this poem written by one of my very good friends, Nuked Fussion on my friends list. The poem is called "The Evolution of Man." This is the link to his blogspot:
http://nukedfussion.blogspot.com/
Do read the poem. Its on second page! :) TC

Points to be understood:(1) The western influence ...

2007-08-15T10:22:00.000+05:30

Points to be understood:

(1) The western influence on the Indian culture cannot be ignored. Anything which does not change rots away, so the change is desirable. What is undesirable, is that instead of adapting, we intend to copy.

(2) The Bhaiya concept is amazing. Women who have claimed to be liberal, have been found to use the word when taking the advantage of men regarding facilities which I have talked here. The point is clear, either say that you are conventional and continue with the Bhaiya syndrome, or accept that you are liberal and bear the same problems as the men do while travelling in a bus. Do not ask for separate sitting places, do not ask men to stand up.

(3) Men being unclear about women is due to the fact that our families and society establish a taboo on talking to girls who are not related to you. Stories are made out, illicit relations and what not. In fact, I remember that even the boys from co-ed schools have very different and incorrect information abt women in many factors. I agree with you regarding the concept of men approaching women as big brothers.

(4) Women want men to look at them is a fact well known in the society. The aim was to expose the fact by giving an example. Some women who claim they are liberal, do not accept this.

(5) Your comments reemphasise the fact that the concept of liberty has not been well understood, and we keep on dwelling on that duality and being happy about it.

(6) Being prejudiced was expected and therefore I have invited comments from people as well.

(7) Maithili Sharan Gupt's lines on "Abala Naari .." do not seem true anymore in the modern society.

Dear Dada Well first of all I appreciate to whatev...

2007-08-15T09:55:00.000+05:30

Dear Dada
Well first of all I appreciate to whatever you have said on feminism. And I also appreciate your analysis on women. But I feel that they are somewhere prejudiced. Let me elaborate on this issue of women's liberty which has amused men for so long on this occasion of independance day. I would however restrain myself of analysing any incident in the Western society.
The word "bhaiya" is used almost universally used by every individual independant of age and not necessarily by the younger public. We have to understand that there is a sense of insecurity associated with women howsoever independant they may be. There have been examples in the past and may be in the present that boys have not respected the relationship of a brother and a sister on most of the occasions. I have even heard from my friends that people approach girls assuming as a big brother but then the relationship changes to no more than or no less than love. Why is it so?
Are boys so incapable? Are they so intolerant?
And if boys are very much clear as to how they should approach girls, this concept of "bhaiya" would not arise at all. I do not remember any instant when girls have greeted me saying "bhaiya".
So why does it happen at all?
It is not the woman who is responsible but men. Men are sometimes not clear as to how they will continue the relationship.
The second example which you quote of whatever happened in the Yahoo chat room, the statement is but obvious. Should we think that we would never ever talk of beauty even though it dances in front of our eyes all the time. There will come a time when we would either say it is good or it is bad. But not commenting at all would be a big achievement. When we find girls saying "tab to bahut mushkil ho jayegii" , it only means that they want boys to roam around them and praise them all the time. And therefore this statement should not be taken as a benchmark or to conclude that women are taking their liberty in their own way. Even boys have said that and I am very well a proof of this.
Well we have never spoken about men's liberty. It would be wrong to say that men are more liberal. It is not very much clear in the Indian context what do we actually mean by liberty?
What I understand is that we should be free in doing whatever we want to do subject to the culture and our upbringing into consideration.
If we find a village girl who some centuries back never used to come out without a veil is dancing to the tunes of "Oh Chamma Chamma" , would we call it as women's liberty? I do not think so.
But the reality is that we find women doing these things every now and then.
And we feel that they are probably redefining liberty.
The final example which you quote "Equality with males and the freedom to choose my own partner" is another example of an expectation rather than liberty.
How many times have we seen girls coming to the bridegroom's house and analysing every credentials of the boy. I guess it was a same issue on which one advertisement came on television channels where the boy tries to impress the girl by making tea and singing a song.
So, this expectation is wrongly interpreted as liberty.
If boys can reject girls by seeing a mere photograph, why girls can't? And if they can , then boys should be ready to accept this as a decision rather than questioning themselves "Do I have that freedom?"